oh yeah, happy valentine’s and that.

it’s been a really rough few days, and frankly i’m surprised i’m not in hospital, but probably grateful as well. my living situation is still completely intolerable and i’m still lost in little dreams of winning even just a couple of grand — enough for a bond — and getting the hell out of here before i end game forever. it’s not a matter of if, anymore, it’s only a matter of when.

when will i live in an actual house. when will i die. which will come first. who knows. i don’t.

as i said before, i’m tired and i’m sad. i’m also bored, stir-crazy, full of hate, this close to screaming, and wishing i could be put into a voluntary medical coma until things get better. i’m fwcking tired of the pain. it’s not even producing any good words.

ganked someone’s DSi from mum (who wasn’t using it; i’m a bitch but i’m not THAT much of a bitch) and am now playing final fantasy 4. we’ve just gotten the sand pearl thingy from the antlion. i kind of love cecil, rydia is amazing, tellah’s hilarious (and also currently gone mad with grief and not with us), and edward is a wet hen on top of being a spoony bard. oh well, we can’t all be the figaro twins, i guess.